Week in Review — 4/08 - 4/14
On Monday, college basketball’s big game meant that no professional hoops were being played. Sadly, it also meant that by being forced to watch the NCAA men’s championship game, we were all reminded why we watch professional basketball instead.
On Tuesday, the Grizzlies lost to the Spurs in a game that featured a veritable who’s who of "who the hell is that?" The poor Grizzlies have actually gone through a league-record 33 different NBA players this year, breaking the previous mark held by the Kardashian sisters. Also, the Bulls managed to encapsulate what the last ten years have been like for Chicago fans with this gem of a play:
On Wednesday, the Nets and Raptors met in a game that answered the question: How much are you actually committed to watching basketball? In related news, that X-Men episode sure was a banger.
On Thursday, the Pistons locked up the worst record in the league with their loss to Chicago. I feel for Detroit fans; I would never wish this kind of season on anyone not cheering for the Lakers.
On Friday, Joel Embiid left the game with what appeared to be another injury. Good to know that despite missing the last two months, the Philadelphia big man is in playoff form. Sorry, Sixers fans. I know I’ve been killing you the last two weeks, but I felt as though I should give you all the attention I can before you head home for the summer in a few days.
On Saturday, for the second time in the week, I was left with a gaping hole in my chest the size of an NBA basketball. Okay, maybe that’s a bit dramatic. I was actually just left to despondently rot on my couch, achingly staring upon my unpowered television screen as I dissolved into a husk of a person, bereft of meaning and purpose, left adrift in a world that no longer seemed nearly as bright as it had the day before this tragedy befell us all.
On Sunday, 13 out of the 15 games being played had potential playoff implications, with the league hitting us with an all-hands-on-deck final day that featured every team in action. Sadly, with only three of the 15 matchups being decided by single digits, the day devolved into a lot of middling basketball that meant much less than we had hoped for. Oh, so this is what it’s like for the five Clippers fans out there. Speaking of the Clippers, adopted national treasure Boban Marjanović said, “free chicken for all” when he intentionally missed this free throw. Being who I am, this had me feeling conflicted. Not because I’m some champion of competition, I just don’t ever know how I feel cheering so aggressively for fried chicken in public spaces.
Remember happiness is free, but anger will cost you everything.