Week in Review — 2/12 - 2/18

On Monday, Victor Wembanyama went for his second career triple-double in a win over the Raptors. This time, becoming just the fourth rookie to notch a trip-dub with blocks. And seriously, like this current version is the worst that this guy is gonna be. So, neon is back, flip phones are a thing again, people are actually wearing JNCOs, and the Spurs have one of the best young big men in the league. My aging brain finds comfort in the recycling of all my childhood experiences. Let me go bust out my Sean John painter’s suit. 

On Tuesday, in response to the prior week’s hottest NBA coaches discussion, @dr.thompson posited a list of most meme-able sideline operators. And far be it for me to sit out a challenge:

1. Doc Rivers – The apex predator in this discussion. No coach better combines under-producing outcomes, with over-producing facial expressions. The only thing Doc does better than exaggerated incredulity is blowing 3-1 leads.

2. Quin Snyder – Our boy is back! When you have the looks of Jack Skellington and the energy of a meth head, well, that’s just the gift that keeps on giving. 

3. Darvin Ham – Between the pained look behind those dark-rimmed eyes and the Kevin James frame, Ham has been the pacesetter in the category this season. 

4. Joe Mazzulla – Where Rivers and Snyder are constant sources of histrionics, Mazzulla’s sometimes too calm in the eye of the storm demeanor has the same vibe as:

5. Ime Udoka – Part on the court scowl and off the court foul, Udoka has proven to be a great source of fodder for jesters like myself. 

On Wednesday, as we prepared for the NBA All-Star break, the league threw 13 games at us, and by the end of the night my thoughts were about as cogent as Michael Porter Jr.’s stance on pay equity. The Warriors lost a game late despite Steph doing something that had never been seen before…gee, where have I seen that before? Also, from the center of redundancies also, the Bulls lost late because of a bad call from the officials and the Hawks lost to a bad team because they are so woeful defensively they would struggle to stop the NBA Threads @werunitback All-Stars. (That is in no way intended to imply that y’all don’t got game.) 

On Thursday, @stevenboydwallace and @jhamartian dropped some mandatory NBA Threads listening with the fifth installment of The NBA Threads Show. And if you haven’t listened already, be prepared to learn synonyms like difficult, challenging, efforted, struggle and laborious, cause they out here trying to ruin standard lexicon. Caitlin Clark only furthered her already impressive application for GOAT status, as she set the women’s college basketball scoring title by connecting on a shot that required her to dial 1 before attempting. 

On Friday, @stillmaco gave y’all the scoop on @roneneffect running more scams than a politician. Personally, I’m here for showing vulnerabilities in the system, I just hope next time the scam involves less feet. All-Star weekend festivities began, and it genuinely warmed my heart to see the NBA Threads community out in Indianapolis enjoying themselves. Also, I’m asking for everyone to sign my petition: I’m hoping to convince my wife to get our living room floor re-done in LED. 

On Saturday, the only All-Star events that matter took place, as the Kia Skills Competition, the AT&T Dunk Contest, the Starry Three-Point Contest, the No Doze after hours party, the Grey Goose lemon drops shots, and the Pantene Pro-v hair hold all happened before Sunday’s big game. The NBA’s dunk contest featured a player who is not in the NBA and a brother of a former dunk champion who I think was just snuck-in in hopes no one would notice. Guilty as charged, I legit thought Obi was competing right-up until his brother missed his first attempt. Steph and Sabrina finally faced-off in their much-anticipated shoot-out, which was a wonderful watch, and a pained listen. It’s not just that Kenny’s take was tone deaf, it’s that he repeated it over and over again as though he was the uncle at Thanksgiving dinner trying to make you understand why that joke he won’t stop telling isn’t actually that racist. It’s a teachable moment for a person I like, so here’s to hoping he learns. And good on Reggie for bringing that smoke, because I’m sure based on his sister’s experiences as a hooper, that was triggering. 

By Sunday, the All-Star week festivities culminated in a 211-186 win for the East. Most people commented on how little defense was played in the game, though Trae Young didn’t seem to think anything was different from a regular season contest. 

That’s my time. Be kind to your fellow humans.